I wouldn’t go back…

Sometimes I lie on my bed and I just want to cry. I get so frustrated sometimes that I actually cry, it’s so easy so say ” lord I trust you” but when faced with a situation where the only way out is to trust God, I panic! I want what I want but He loves me so much that He wouldn’t give it to me and those moments, when I have planned for so long how a certain thing should go and it doesn’t go that way and I can hear the Holy Spirit telling me to let it be, I fight and throw tantrums, I just want to walk away from everything, maybe then I will have my way but God wouldn’t just have it! I wouldn’t have my way even if I were to stop being a Christian today! It’s now I understand what a covenant really is… Even if I don’t want to keep to my part of the covenant it doesn’t stop God from keeping to His part of it! This love I do not understand, how can you not let me have my way when I want to, when I have taken so much pains to plan things, why not just let me go on? 

It’s that covenant I made with Him, that I will serve Him with everything and that He should watch over me and bless me! He implied into it an unconditional love, an unbreakable promise, to do all that He has to do because He loves me so much!! 

Even after knowing all this, I can’t just let Him have His way, it’s not like I can’t, it’s that it isn’t easy to, not when everyone has moved on ahead in life and I am still behind. How come everyone is getting married, having jobs, kids and I’m still here? How come everyone is losing weight and no matter the effort I put into it I just can’t? Why is my own case different? 

I may never know the full answer to all my questions but I know that He loves me… 

And it should be enough, I want it to be enough, I want to reach a point where no matter what happens, just knowing that God loves me will be enough….

God has called you?

 

 Yes He called you! 

No doubts about that…. It’s not like He said “John, I have called you to serve me” ( He may have said that to you, it’s different for people), it’s also a knowing in your spirit, it’s more than a feeling, it’s truth downloaded from the spirit of God that you have been called to do greater things! The fire is burning, you are so passionate, so happy, it’s an Honour and Priviledge to be called by the Most High God! 

So what next? 

Are you just sitting there, doing the same things you use to do? Just waiting for the miracle to happen? 

Lol, Ok ok ok…😄

U have to sit at His feet, pick up the word and study! 

Not just morning devotions or before you sleep! No

You have to intentionally sacrifice time through out the day, as much time as you can make in a day to sit and learn the word! Sometimes it isn’t just about reading the bible, it’s about spending time in His presence! Knowing that He knows you are there and at the right time He will speak to you! 

It’s not easy!! But don’t forget how you got to where you are today…

In the beginning…..(1)

 Okay,  Where  do I start? 

I didn’t want to do this, to start this blog, to tell people about Jesus Christ, about God so publicly, I just wanted to be a Christian in the closet, live a good life, love God, love my family, you know be the cool kid who just had it all, party on Saturday then go to church on Sunday but God wasn’t having none of that, nope, He wasn’t. 

Out of the blues, I felt this desire to serve God, to do it out in the open, I was surprised you know, this wasn’t a part of my 20 year plan, it wasn’t even in my do it tomorrow plan, not at all 🙅🙅. 

There I was, being seriously influenced by friends, being a stamara ( speech impairment), I couldn’t make a statement for 5 mins without stammering, I was scared out of my mind, I didn’t know what to do. 

Ofcourse at some point, i began to feel excited, after being in a place of rejection, inferiority, pity, self-hate; for sure I was happy you know, that I had been picked, chosen, accepted, just whatever to do God’s work but when it dawned on me what it entailed I panicked. 

I think I gave up at that time for like 5 short minutes or so! I asked God if He wasn’t making a mistake, lol, are you sure it’s me? Not my perfect friends or family? Me? And He said yes! 

😌😌😌

My Testimony

I have stood and watched God take me from a place of mess to that of grace, I have seen him take me from a place of low self esteem, from a place of inferiority complex to a position of authority, I have seen God take away my pride and humble me, I have experienced the feeling of peace gradually replacing that of anger, I have truly and sincerely seen him keep to his words! 

Hands down what a wonderful God we serve, who will transform, reform, conform us, just to prove us wrong! There is nothing this our God cannot do! 

Praise Jehovah!!!

Each to their (God) (god)

I’m about sleeping and I decide to just read Luke 12 before I sleep. I’m on a journey to finish the entire bible. (👯👯).

I have come to know that knowing the word is life saving, it’s like studying everyday cos u don’t know when the teacher may give a surprise test, it helps cos things come up and when I pray, the Holy Spirit is able to pull out what is already in my spirit and viola, a Solution within minutes! 

• Anyways this is what I learnt today: 

We are able to predict things that will happen yet with all these signs of the end time we are not able to know or see that one day, this world will end! It is only just a matter of time! 

As christians we are lucky and blessed that God has decided to give us signs and warnings, and that we should be prepared: to each his own! When the world ends, the one true God that created this world will come and take those who believed in Him, so yes most people don’t believe in God but whatever it is you believe in, look around you, the world around us is deteriorating, and that time will come when this world as we know it will end, what then will happen? Even if let’s assume there are several gods, each god will take his own, so each person to their god! Let’s go further and assume that at the end of the tunnel, it’s God who picks everyone up? You really have nothing to lose if you believe in God , because if He is real, you go to heaven and if there is no one there, well whatever happens happens.

For us christians, the signs are clear, our Lord will and is coming soon, are we ready for him? Have we made things ready for His coming? If we knew thieves were coming to our homes, oh how we would make sure our homes are secured. Security guards everywhere, the police and our doors would be bolted and locked.

Have we secured our minds for the Lord? Have we secured our souls and spirits for God? Is the Holy Spirit standing guard in your life? Keeping you secured, alert and ready until the time comes? 

It’s never too late, we have now, not tomorrow, now! Let’s make it worth it! 

Hope you enjoyed this😉

Goodnight all the way from Africa!! 

How great you are, our faithful God!!

It’s mid afternoon and it’s really really hot here! It’s going to be evening soon and it’s going to get cooler! 

As I sit here, I remember the faithfulness of God, I’m reminded of how great He has been and how great He is! In the good times and in the bad, God has been great and faithful! 

I’m reminded of the story of job who God greatly blessed and prospered! The devil saw this and tested and tempted job so he could doubt and deny God but he didn’t! Things got really bad, yet he didn’t deny God! 

When you look through the bible you will notice that we have been given and provided a way out of every situation! It may not be specific but there is a solution in the bible to any and every problem you may have. 

He took His time and made sure that we were well catered for! Not just in the good times but also in the bad and in the hard times! Isn’t that great? 

When going through my timeline I see many articles of people who are atheists, or agnostics, who may have had faith at one point but are now doubtful or not even believing that there is a God! I have come to know that the greatest atheists out there today  were once great christians at one time. Its actually scary cos I wonder what would have made them stop believing in God! I don’t blame them neither do I judge tbem, the devil is constantly fighting our faith, making us doubt in God at one point Or another. This is why each day as i marvel at the faithfulness and the greatness of God, I pray to God to give me the strength to hold on, help me to flee or successfully overcome such temptations. I know it isn’t easy but I also know that it’s worth it. 

There’s actually nothing to lose you know! If I am unsure or if I have doubts as to the existence of heaven and I don’t believe and there is actually heaven, I lose right? So why not just believe and if there is I gain and if there isn’t I don’t lose either, right? 

I know there is a counter argument to that but that’s just me! 

Have a happy holiday and enjoy the Easter! 

Gracias!!

When I think upon your goodness, your sacrifice, your faithfulness each day, I’m convinced it’s not because I am worthy, to receive the kind of love that you give. 

When I look at my life, when I look at myself, I know without a doubt that I don’t deserve your what you did and what you keep doing! 

Thank you father, for loving me the way you do, for sending your son to die on the cross for me! 

Thank you Jesus for obedience because without it, I would have been the devil’s playground! 

  

I’m Alive

Waking up to see another new day is amazing! 

Sometimes I wonder what happens when we sleep, like what makes us different from those people who didn’t wake up? Some of them were even better christians, like they served God properly and all yet they are dead! Most people will tell me that the answer is grace but they also had grace right? 

Well, no matter the reason, I’m happy I’m alive today! I have another chance to correct the wrongs of yesterday and make a better tomorrow! 

It isn’t easy sometimes for us to see what God has done for us! For me it is in the little things that I see that He has been faithful! It’s in that voice that stopped me from crossing the road immediately before that speeding car passed by, it’s in that voice that made me drop the poisoned food that would have caused my unbearable tummy ache or even in that voice that showed me where to read from for my exams and midsems! 

Little drops of water make an ocean! In the little things He has done for me, He has been greatly faithful and merciful!Edit 

The breaking point…

As a Christian, a time will come when where you are wouldn’t be enough, where your spirit will desire a deeper connection with the Spirit of God,where just being wouldn’t be enough, where you will need to constantly sense and be in the presence of God. 

I have been broken, I have been humbled in the presence of God and still going through it! I have had to move from being emotionally immoveable to emotionally imbalanced! I have had to work into fire, feeling the heat and trusting that I wouldn’t be burned and that even if I were burned, I wouldn’t have scars, and that if I were to have scars, they wouldn’t stay for long! I have had to have faith and doubts having a tournament inside me, having faith and fear constantly battle in my mind, trusting and forsaking the trust, all because I sought to be in the presence of God. No one said it was going to be easy, they all said it will be worth it! 

Brokenness is what we need, holiness is what we need, righteousness is what we should desire and long for, it is all what He wants from us; from me and from you! He needs your brokenness so he can fix you, (sometimes the pain isn’t in the leg, it’s all in the mind!) He has to go back to the root and find the problem, you need to be broken for God to build you up into perfection! Even the bible says that using new material to repair an old one will only make the tear worse! 

Allow God fix you up!  

I love this song 👇👇👇👇👇

  

 

Mark Six

Not everyone would believe in what you are doing or in what God has asked you to do! Don’t fret but put your hope and trust in God and not in man! Be independent of their thoughts, their opinions and feelings! Focus on that mission which God has called you and asked you to do! 

We have been given authority and power over evil spirits and demons, which means that they have no hold whatsoever over us! We have the authority to cast them out and to heal people!

Just because herodias’s daughter danced, Herod promised to give her anything she asked for, even half of his kingdom. What then do we think God will do for those who please Him, who are constantly doing His will and seeking to please Him? He will do so much more than an earthly king! 

There is nothing that God isn’t willing to do for us! It takes time to appreciate and understand it but He gave up His only son for us, to die on the cross so that today we might live freely and peacefully. 

Herod killed for a person who pleased Him! Our enemies have no victory or hold over us, God will destroy them just so we can live peacefully! The extent to which God is willing to go for us is just unimaginable!

It’s not the size that matters! No matter how small or big a thing or a person is, God is ever ready and willing to use it or them in a very big way! Nothing or no one can ever limit God. Anything or anyone blessed by God will be prosperous and enlarged! No matter how small they are, one God chooses and decided to bless them, He will. 

Fear can sometimes make us lose sight of that which is just before us! It will make us terrified of something that should not have invited fear in the first place! 

In the midst of trouble, we often times forget what God has already done for us, letting fear suppress and scare us!